What Bridget Jones Taught Us About Sex

Many of us will readily admit that we associate at least part of ourselves with our much-loved, flawed heroine, Bridget Jones. Navigating life with about as much delicacy as a bull in a china shop; she has taught females globally, that it is ok to laugh at yourself, and more importantly to be yourself. However, that’s not all. In the most recent instalment of this popular franchise, we see two dreamy, successful and sensitive men fight for her affections. So, what can our fantastically-normal heroine teach us about sex?

 

Confidence is attractive

Bridget may be somewhat introspective and self-deprecating however, she muddles through life with a confident optimism that unfortunate situations can always be turned around – even when they appear to be at their worst. The result? Men, who she previously deemed to be out of her league, find themselves enticed by her sunny disposition and positive outlook on life.   

Bridget Jones: I truly believe that happiness is possible… even when you're thirty-three and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.

It’s ok to own a pair of granny pants!

So our Bridget-Jones-King-Kong-one-size-fits-all-granny-pants might not be our most attractive pair, but boy are they comfortable! Generally, g-strings give about as much comfort as rolled sand-paper. And, when we want that little extra help to fit into our glitzy little-black dress, they have our backs…or bottoms / tums. So yes, it’s ok for us to admit that our favourite pair resembles something similar to a make-shift parachute.  

Check the expiry dates on your condoms

If you’re not looking to plan or expand upon your family; it is a good idea to check the expiry dates on your condoms. Couples, in the heat of the moment will rarely check, so it is worth looking through your drawer on returning home from work one day. 

But are they really that likely to fail, once expired?

As noted on goaskalice.columbia.edu:

The latex used to make most condoms degrades with time, so to keep them performing as desired, it's best to stick with ones that are within their sell by date. When stored in a cool, dry place; condoms without spermicide are generally good for around five years from the time they are manufactured. 

Condoms with spermicide last about two years. Usually the expiration dates are printed on the back. It is not advisable to use a condom after the expiration date. Heat, sun, moisture, and fluorescent light can all cause damage to packaged latex condoms, as can hauling them around in your pocket, wallet, or purse. It's also important to check that the package is sealed before opening it — each package should feel like a pillow of air is sealed inside. 

Good guys aren’t dull

The 21st century witnessed modern depictions of manhood change somewhat from the once chivalrous gent, to a character depicted as dangerous, misunderstood and who usually had enjoyed a string of relationships (only to realise their love at a later point for the heroine in the film). 

However, the Bridget Jones (film) trilogy manages to reignite the sexual tension between two fundamentally flawed, but essentially good characters; Bridget and Mark, allowing viewers to emotionally invest in their courtship over the course of the three films. This seemingly allowed producers to introduce the unmistakably charming and charismatic character, Jack (Patrick Dempsey) to the mix in the third film without him becoming a far more preferable choice. 

Despite Jack being pitched as an almost too-good-to-be-true kind of guy; the majority of fans remained loyal to Bridget and Mark’s romance. With good-guy Jack ripping off his top and diving in to save Bridget, when she slips beneath the surface of the swimming pool; and with Mark making use of a pizza delivery truck to run Bridget as close to the hospital as feasibly possible (before carrying her the rest of the way); it is fair to say that the good guys wage their fair share of excitement too. Sorry bad boys; you have nothing on 

Bridget: Wait a minute… nice boys don't kiss like that.
Mark Darcy: Oh, yes, they fucking do.

It’s not all about the size of your puppet


Rather, how one uses their puppet. Big puppets without strings may be fun however, that doesn’t account for everything! Sex is a really important factor within a relationship however, it’s not the only factor. Personality, chemistry and shared experiences all contribute to the fundamentals of what makes a relationship.

Shazza: So it lasted six hours.
Shazza’s Daughter: What lasted six hours?
Shazza: The puppet show that Auntie Bridge went to.

So last but not least, if you haven't seen the latest Bridget Jones, here's a sneak peak of the additional attributes you could learn about sex; as provided to us by Bridget herself! 

Feature image credit: Aysezgicmeli/Shutterstock